A few nights a week, and sometimes more, I go visiting other blogs. They generally are blogs written by other homeschool moms, blogs about the christian life, or blogs about cooking. I have found some great ideas for curriculum, parenting, and teaching from other moms who blog. In fact, I think all my curriculum choices this year came about from reading reviews on blogs. Reading other blogs has also helped me when I have needed a dose of inspiration on my parenting journey. Laughing is always a good thing, and some posts on parenting can really give a person a good chuckle.
Sometimes a simple post on a blog can be such a comfort on a day when I don't feel like I am juggling it all well enough. I have 5 kids with me 24/7, I'm homeschooling 3 of them. I also have the normal daily tasks of caring for a household of 7 people, 2 dogs, and 2 hens. Throw in some remodeling to the mix too. The past few years have been my hardest. I don't get everything done, although I do try. I've had to put things on a list in order of importance, and I tackle things in that order. I've had to learn to say no to others requests or my own desires and concentrate more on my kids and my home. And that is not a bad thing at all. I love staying home, I love homeschooling, and I love being with my kids all day. I would not change a thing :o) I just need to let go of the guilt I sometimes feel when I can't help out at church, or I can't make it to an outing, or I can't volunteer for something that I desire to do. I also need to give myself a little grace when I don't get to all my emails in a timely manner(or even worse...forget about them) and when I don't have perfectly organized,clean home(those who know me well know this has always been a struggle).
This weekend has been a very exhausting time for me. My baby caught the stomach flu on Saturday. He was up the entire night moaning and groaning with a high fever and a lot of bodly fluids going on. I slept about 2 hours as I spent most the night rocking him and cuddling with him. Yesterday morning he finally fell into a good sleep, and after a few hours woke up with no fever. Yeah! So, yesterday was a very tiring day for me. I did not get to take a nap. I had a lot I needed to get done, and kids who still needed me. So by the time evening came, I was really low on gas. We got the older kids to bed, and then I got to do some blog reading while my baby was playing next to me. I read a blog written by a homeschool mom of 4 who wrote about struggles that she was having. It really hit home for me! I so related to most of what she said.
Here's a few excerts.
"A definite cause of my struggles, though not the root problem, has been the struggle to adjust to four children. This has been a tough adjustment for me, though admittedly, the first year of each child’s life contained a difficult period of adjustment.
Life has been redefined. Some things will change for a short time period and others will have to change for good. I have to accept my new limitations and try to rediscover what I need to do, what I can do, and what I want to do. And I have been finding it tough when my desires conflict with what I can or need to do.
I used to organize activities for groups, remember important dates like birthdays, keep up with blogging or scrapbooking, find information out for friends, and balance a million other activities and involvements. In the midst of that I was always good about keeping up with folks, checking in with them, and meeting new people.
I just can’t anymore.
Chances are that someone reading this has been the victim of this new “me”. I have probably forgotten their birthday or couldn’t follow through on my desire to get together sometime, stopped reading/commenting on their blog, or mentioned that I would call and never did.
This new version of me has seriously caused a shock to my system. It has been quite an adjustment to realize how much I can’t do any longer. I just don’t have the time, energy, or even the desire to keep up in all the areas that I used to.
So I have let a lot of things go......
........So God has been working on my heart. Pulling me back to Him and reminding me to abide in Him. When I abide there, my life is naturally more purposed. I am not distracted by all of the things I “ought” to do so that I can keep up. He’s reminding me that it should be about Him, not about me.
And these days, I find myself more peaceful and more restful.
I let some of the demands slip away. I don’t need to perform. I don’t need to keep up appearances.
The house remains dirty.
The blog remains untouched, except on Tuesdays mostly.
Cards I wanted to send are forgotten.
Phone calls aren’t promptly returned.
The scrapbooking materials get stored in the corner of the basement.
Someone else steps up to organize playdates.
Another person takes on the task of coordinator.
I can't volunteer to help where I might like to.
I pass on nights out when I know I need more nights in.
And I attempt to rest in Him.
Right now, I can’t keep up with everything. Though, I suspect I need to keep up with some of the things…like the house. But some of the other things God will take care of using other folks. And in some of the areas, I often feel like I have failed or let someone down. I admit that I have had to offer up more than one apology.
But I pray for wisdom as I focus on my priorities. And I pray that I will abide in Him more deeply each day. I want it to be more about Him and less about me"
It is a comfort to know that I am not alone. Not that I thought I was the only mom who struggles, but it was something I needed last night. I was struggling with the fact that I had not gotten my list of things done. My home was not very clean(and my room is even worse) , nor did not get the lesson plans done that I needed too, and I have a few people whom I have been wanting/neeeding to email. I also did not make lunch or dinner on Sunday which really bothered me becasue I had just bought enough groceries to fill up 2 shopping carts. But all is well. I am at peace and I love my life. I got to hold my kids, read with them, and play with them. I am thankful that a new day has started with all healthy kids. I am thankful that I have the opportunity to let God lead me in all my endevours. I am thankful for friends and family who show me a lot of patience and grace. Lastly, I am so thankful for fellow moms who take the time to share their lives via blogs(and Facebook too).
:o)
Football.......shocking isn't it :o)
Say Cheese!
He's getting around.
The girls and their cosuin found these matching shirts at Walmart.
We're in trouble! She'a already taking pictures of herself. Reminds me of my lil's sis :o)
